How many of us look in the mirror and begin looking at ourselves only to focus on our imperfections? More than likely, there are many more of us who do as opposed to those who do not. It’s not that anything is wrong with understanding you as a whole; which includes knowing both your imperfections and you’re individually defined attributes and qualities.
First thing first; everyone has something about themselves they just either hate, or wish it was slightly different. For instance, I don’t necessarily like my nose, not because it’s ugly, just because I would like something a little different. Sometimes I do not like my curly hair because when I wear it straight I have to be careful that the humidity doesn’t get a hold to it. I don’t like that I’m petite, or little because I’ve always wanted to weigh about 135lbs; put some meat on my bones. But when it all boils down to it, I’m who I am and I had to learn to accept that about me.
I know we all have heard the saying; “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” which only means it’s whatever the viewer sees’s or believes to be beautiful. So, let us define beauty. According to all the definitions, beauty is a characteristic and quality within a person, animal, place, or an object that is perceived to be an experience of pleasure. Not one definition referred to beauty as only the physical. Great examples of how we have distorted the real meaning of beauty; there are those who believe women are beautiful because they maybe tall and thin with long hair. So, does this necessarily mean all tall thin long haired women are beautiful; absolutely not, but there are those who believe this to be true; therefore causing women to believe, in order to be beautiful you must have long hair and stand 6 feet tall and weigh 100lbs. Another example is the beauty between dark skinned black women vs. light skinned black women. Although many of us would say beauty comes in all different shapes, color, and sizes doesn’t prevent others for believing the idea that beauty is seen more in light skinned women over dark skinned women, and yes, this creates a lingering problem, not only low self-image for dark skinned woman, but an arrogance in light skinned woman. Another example where beauty is considerably undivided is blonde hair blue eyes vs. any other. I know plenty blonde hair blue eye woman who believe because they have blonde hair blue eyes are more beautiful than any other; say it isn’t so. Well, I wish it wasn’t.
Even though beauty seems very difficult to define and to explain, naturally this is because many of us view beauty from the standpoint of physical attributes only. And as shallow as it seems, it’s the reality for majority of women and men. When this sort of misconception creeps in we receive a flood of destroyed self-image and self-concept distorting the true meaning of beauty. This sort of behavior and attitude allows individuals to fester in subjective thinking. Despite putting the truth out, many of us will still continue to believe these misconceptions, only creating other issues as jealousy, envy, resentment, division, and in some cases, pure hate.
Beauty is a huge topic because it’s one of those elements that affect self-esteem. Although we know there are other factors involved with low self-esteem, one we don’t; genetics. However, we do have control in what we choose to believe, especially as it pertains to ourselves; this is part of the intricate details of life that we must learn; finding what truly makes an individual beautiful. Perhaps your beauty isn’t in the physical, but beauty can still be found.
Beauty is more than physical; it helps divide all the great things about an individual. We must face facts; physically everyone is not on the same level. There are those who we wished we only looked like because we believe they have a better life; not true, even physically beautiful people become unhappy and dissatisfied. Remember, self-esteem is exactly that, it belongs to self, not anyone else. If we continue to allow society views on beauty to place us in a category, we will never truly understand the real meaning of our own beauty.
True story, many years ago a young lady swore she was the best looking girl in town, and once I got a chance to know her, her outside was physically attractive; however, when she opened her mouth and began to speak, she struck me as foolish and having no clue of how ignorant she sounded. She believed because she was light skinned with a decent grade of hair (understand this is major amongst black women) at any rate, she lacked class, charisma, elegance, even proper English; yet, in her eyes she was absolutely beautiful and that was all she needed. It was a shame to allow someone to continue believing something that had been absolutely untrue; not because she didn’t have the physical attributes but because she lacked all other qualities that truly make an individual beautiful.
Remember, we are not all made the same and there are those who are born as physically beautiful people, you’re unable to take that away. But please do not ever believe beauty only stops there. Beauty is a combination of many things, but one thing beauty is not; is shallow.
My Face Book Posts 